Break-ups are never fun. And nothing hurts after a break-up more than the emptiness someone’s absence always leaves behind. As a way of satisfying our egos, we like to think that another man will erase the traces of the first. Rebounds work for a little bit, but they only result in more pain.
Here is why you should not jump into a rebound relationship.
Emotional confusion
Being with someone else can sure get your mind off your loneliness. But it’s like drinking water when are hungry. You will keep drinking more and more and your hunger will only keep increasing. The person you’re really yearning for and the one you are seeing are completely different; this will only leave you confused and never quite satisfied.
Being unfair
You might be getting into something knowing that it is just a rebound for you. But the guy you are seeing might really start to get attached to you; even though we like to think that guys don’t really care, they do! Hurting someone else will only make you feel more miserable and will make your post-break up period even harder to get over.
Circle of friends
If you have hopes or plans for getting back to your ex-relationship, a rebound can threaten that at times. While you are broken up and it seems like anything is fair game, dating someone connected to your ex will only make it that much more difficult for you guys to get back together. Even if you think they are worlds apart, you never know — the world is a much smaller place than we often think.
Being taken advantage of
When you are hurt, you are very vulnerable. Your brain is not functioning the way it normally would. You might tend to believe anything and dupe yourself into feeling comfortable. As a result, it can be very easy for someone to lie to you and take advantage of you in some form. No woman needs to be taken advantage of by a man when she is already grieving over another man.
Sex and rebound
You might think that sex is the answer, but it never is. When in pain, you might be willing to do things you wouldn’t do on a regular day. You might jump into bed with someone way too soon, which will only leave you feeling more vulnerable. Women feel more vulnerable after having sex. Not getting the emotional support you were originally lacking will hurt you even more
“You” needs work
After breaking up with someone, you are just not the same person. You will not be ready to date someone else or know anyone else until you really know yourself again. Allow yourself some time to figure out why, exactly, you are hurt and what is it that you need, so you can look for something different in your next go.
Never settle
You owe it to yourself to wait for someone you truly like and someone you are really compatible with. After a break-up you want to jump at the first opportunity and you might be settling without even realizing it. So take your time and think well.
more on break-ups
Ten ways to stay strong and healthy after a big break-up
How to get your stuff back after a breakup
5 tips for breaking up… and getting back together
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