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5 Unspoken rules no Amazing Race contestant should ever break

After four weeks of blasé challenges and detours, we finally got a little action tonight. And by a little, I mean all the challenges that we didn’t see in the first four episodes were crammed into the fifth week. It’s as though the producers thought that if the teams didn’t kill the Green Team, the challenges would.

I’m just kidding. I actually have a confession – the Green Team is starting to grow on me. I know, it’s crazy but it’s true. Say what you will about Justin, but he knows the game. He’s made a couple of slips along the way, but he definitely is a game player and doesn’t make the kinds of mistakes that could cost him.

Unlike the rest of the teams tonight… It’s as though, in their race to gain traction, they completely forgot the basic, unspoken rules of The Amazing Race. What are these rules? If you’re a real super fan, you already know. There are plenty, but for tonight, let’s focus on the big five:

Always read the clue

This is a big one, and it seems simple enough that I shouldn’t have to mention it, but apparently I do. You get a clue, you read it — you read it again, and then you go do it and, hopefully, get finished in time. Why did the Track Stars miss this lesson? They managed to do this not once, but twice tonight. To make matters worse, it was the same clue. Always. Read. The. Clue.

Don’t be indecisive. At all.

Should I do this challenge or you? No — you do it; I did it last time. Are you sure? The Paparazzi had a leg full of stupid mistakes, and indecision was a big one. When it came to the detour, they changed their minds three times on which detour to take. Teams — you make a decision and you stick with it. This is a race, not a trip to the grocery store where you choose one can of beans over the other.

Pay attention to the details

Every season this happens. Teams get so anxious when they’re behind that they blindly follow the car or team in front of them because they think it’s the right way to go. No, no, no. Stop, look around and you’ll see that nine times out of 10, the path is right in front of you. Three teams fell victim to this tonight.

Keep it together, man!

It’s a jungle out there, and it’s not as easy as it looks as when you’re watching from your sofa. But, when you’re racing for a million dollars, you don’t just stop and start having a mental breakdown. This rule has been broken more times this season than any other that I remember.

Don’t argue with your partner. It’s not productive.

I honestly think The Paparazzi’s Logan wished she could have pushed Chris off that ledge during the gorge challenge. Shoot, I wish I could have pushed him. These two did a fabulous job of taking the heat off of the Green Team for most annoying team. I lost count of how many times they told each other “don’t talk to me.” You can argue at home or even during sleeping hours, but the middle of the race is not the time to do it.

What other mistakes did you see being made tonight? Are you slowly warming up to Justin and the Green Team like I am?

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