Kenya Moore shares heartbreaking story about her mother in new memoir (PHOTO)

Kenya Moore‘s memoir already appears to be heartbreaking.

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The The Real Housewives of Atlanta star shared the first 42 pages of her book on Instagram this week, allowing her followers to get a sneak peek at the work she’s been doing to document her troubled upbringing.

“I AM NOT INVISIBLE,” she wrote to her followers. “It’s hard to express how I really feel sometimes so I write. I started my memoir years ago but found it difficult to complete. As a thank you for all your love and support from my difficult and often painful journey with my family I want to share the first chapters with my loyal fans and friends. Thank you for your compassion, kindness and love.”

On Sunday’s episode of The Real Housewives of Atlanta, viewers saw Moore attempting to connect with her birth mother, who refused to open the door when Moore visited. In the first pages of her memoir, Moore tells the story of Patricia Moore, who gave birth to Kenya at 16 years old and rejected her. Moore was raised instead by her paternal grandmother.

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“I think she resents my life, my body, my breath, with every part of her being,” Moore writes in her book. “I believe she wishes I were dead. I believe it would make her life a whole lot easier.”

In the second chapter, Moore tells a gut-wrenching story of being 4 years old and waiting for a phone call from her mother.

“Maybe she was finally going to tell me she wanted me and she didn’t mean to give me away when I was born,” she writes. “Maybe she was finally going to tell me she made a terrible mistake and now she wanted me to live with her; that we would be a real family and start over.”

Instead, Moore’s mother told her, “I am not your mother. You can never call me your mother and you can’t come over here anymore.”

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Read the rest of the excerpt from Moore’s memoir here.