On May 5, Netflix hosted one of their rare live events as they streamed The Roast of Tom Brady on the platform. And while Brady seemed ready to take some punches, the retired NFL star was joined by quite an impressive list of friends, comedians and actors including host Kevin Hart, Julian Edelman, Rob Gronkowski, Nikki Glaser and Kim Kardashian.
Of course, as part of any roast, nothing is truly off-limits. From their personal life to their professional downfalls, everything is fair game is a roast this important. So, unsurprisingly, a few couldn’t help but joke about Brady’s ex-wife Gisele Bündchen, and her new boyfriend, Joaquim Valente.
“Gisele gave you an ultimatum. She said you have to retire or you’re done,” Hart said to Brady, who famously retired then unretired 40 days later in 2022, per Us Weekly. “But when you have a chance to go eight and nine you gotta do it.”
The Fatherhood star then continued, saying that Brady “f—” New England Patriots coach Bill Belichick when he left for the Tampa Bay Buccaneers. “You f–– him good. You did, Tom, you f–– your coach, but let me tell you something people … that’s what you’ve got to do to maintain your happiness. You sometimes got to f— your coach,” Hart said. “You know who else f–— their coach? Gisele. She f–– that karate man.”
As a reminder, Valente has been Bündchen and her family’s jiu-jitsu instructor for many years before his and Bündchen’s connection turned romantic.
“I mean Jesus Christ, Tom. One of the smartest quarterbacks ever played a game. How did you not see this coming? Eight f— karate classes a day,” Hart continued. “Eight karate classes a day and she’s still a white belt.”
In addition to Hart’s brutal digs, who left Brady clearly uncomfortable, comedian Nikki Glaser also talked about the Brazilian supermodel. “You have seven rings. Well, eight now that Gisele gave hers back,” Glaser said. Ouch!
Jeff Ross wasn’t afraid to talk about Bündchen either. “Give it up for the lord of the Super Bowl rings: my friend Tom Brady, a man who has so many rings, he could melt them down and forge a sword to go on a quest to get Gisele back from that jujitsu teacher,” he joked, per The Hollywood Reporter.
It’s safe to say the comedians weren’t afraid to get personal during Brady’s roast. But that’s the goal of the special in the first place, right?
Before you go, click here to see celebrity exes who never buried the hatchet.
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