Throughout her impressive gymnastics career, Shawn Johnson became one of the country’s most beloved athletes, from the Olympics and beyond. So, of course, when she took a step back from the sport and retired in 2012, at age 20, fans were upset, feeling like she cut her career off before it even began.
In a new interview with Elle, however, Johnson broke down exactly why she left the sport, and we’re applauding her for listening to herself.
“I defined who I was by gymnastics,” Johnson told the outlet. “I put so much pressure on myself as a kid. Now, as a mom, I look back and I’m like, ‘Oh honey, you should have had more fun.'”
As a reminder, Johnson won a total of four Olympic medals at the Olympic Games in Beijing in 2008. In addition to three silver medals, she also took home the gold for the Balance Beam.
Despite her success, however, all Johnson focused on was the pressure. “We were kids who didn’t know how to digest the competitiveness that the world was placing on us,” Johnson remembered. “We isolated ourselves from each other, even though we really needed each other more than anything.”
Then, four years later, when she was training for the 2012 London Games, she knew she wasn’t in the right mind to compete. “[I was] really run down, both physically and mentally,” she said, adding that she was “actually scared of being selected.”
“I don’t think I was the best there, and if my seniority placed me [on the team], I would’ve been taking that from someone else, which they deserved a lot more than I did,” she reflected. “It just didn’t seem fair, so it was my time to be like, ‘I’m good.’”
A week before the trials began, she announced her retirement. “It was just this overwhelming feeling of being done,” she admitted. “I wanted out of this system that just pushed and pushed and pushed overtraining and undereating. I protected myself by leaving the sport.”
Since leaving the spot, Johnson’s found herself again and started a family of her own with her husband, Andrew East. Johnson and East, who got married in 2016, share young kids Drew, 4, Jett, 3, and their infant son, Bear.
Looks like Johnson made the right decision by leaving the toxicity of gymnastics behind, and starting her new life instead.
Before you go, click here to see Team USA Olympians over the years.
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