Jennifer Lopez is opening up about the summer leading up to her split from Ben Affleck in a candid first interview since filing for divorce in August.
Lopez, 55, chatted with comedian Nikki Glaser for a conversation featured in Interview magazine on October 9. Lopez candidly revealed that she spent the summer getting to know herself better amid her marriage breakdown.
“The work is figuring yourself out,” Lopez said. “You have to be good on your own. I thought I learned that, but I didn’t. And then, this summer, I had to be like, ‘I need to go off and be on my own. I want to prove to myself that I can do that.'”
Lopez said that coming to this realization felt “lonely, unfamiliar, scary. It feels sad. It feels desperate,” but she ultimately realized she needed to find joy within herself.
“Being in a relationship doesn’t define me. I can’t be looking for happiness in other people. I have to have happiness within myself,” she said. “I used to say I’m a happy person, but was still looking for something for somebody else to fill, and it’s just like, ‘No, I’m actually good.'”
Then, Lopez alluded to potential pitfalls of past relationships while being careful not to name Affleck or explicitly discuss their three-year marriage.
When Glaser asked if she was practicing loving herself before trying to find love with someone else, Lopez responded, “That, to me, is a scary thing too, or a confusing thing, because it’s like, ‘Oh, you couldn’t love me if I have flaws. I have to be perfect to be loved.’ That’s not true!”
“Somebody who truly loves you will help you heal those parts of yourself,” she added. “That’s what I’ve learned about love, that it is a secure thing. You make me feel safe, and when I fall short of the glory, you understand me and you help me to grow to be better, because you have your boundaries and I have my boundaries.”
As for whether this means Lopez had raised her standards for her next romantic partner, the singer said there is no one on the cards. She explained: “Here’s the thing: There’s no new bar because I’m not looking for anybody. How’s that?”
Lopez and Affleck married in 2022, a year after reconciling almost two decades after they ended their first engagement. The singer was the one who ultimately pulled the plug on their romance, filing for divorce on August 20 with their date of separation listed as April 26, 2024.
“She tried really hard to make things work, and is heartbroken,” a source told People of her decision. “The kids are a top priority, as they always have been.”
Before you go, click here for all the celebrity splits and divorces we never saw coming.
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