The quickest way to ruin Halloween is to give a kid a gross piece of candy.
Or worse yet, no candy at all. Or a nonfood item. Leave the erasers at the school store, because tonight is all about one thing: shoving your face full of delicious, delicious sugar. Unfortunately some people seem unable to grasp the spirit of Halloween, and their offerings leave a lot to be desired.
Top Top-10 Worst #UnwantedHalloweenTreats
1. Condiments
https://twitter.com/charleybitton/status/528218787850747904
You have to be seriously twisted to give someone your unwanted Taco Bell fire sauce packets instead of candy… That stuff’s not even spicy.
2. Spermies
#UnwantedHalloweenTreats spermies pic.twitter.com/pblcwZrbL3
— Bob Kostic (@causticbob) October 31, 2014
The candy itself won’t scare your kids, but the “special talk” you need to have with them after they receive a box of Spermies will probably scar them for life.
3. Black jelly beans
#UnwantedHalloweenTreats Black Jelly Beans pic.twitter.com/JMuF2DCov7
— NEVER FORGET ME (@rocks176) October 31, 2014
If your kid actually likes black licorice jelly beans, then watch out. They’re probably (definitely) a sociopath.
4. Camel Balls
SOOOO I WAS AT WALMART GETTING CANDY FOR HALLOWEEN AND FOUND THIS…DA FAQ IS THIS #UnwantedHalloweenTreatspic.twitter.com/g5LImHJ9q6
— TheeFairyLashMother (@theelashmother) October 31, 2014
I can think of literally no reason why liquid-filled, sour bubble gum Camel Balls exist.
5. Halloween pretzels
#UnwantedHalloweenTreats these gross things pic.twitter.com/iyXAxCsoqU
— kale | #blm (@bi_loser99) October 30, 2014
100 percent guarantee these are the stalest pretzels you’ve ever tasted.
6. These weird things
The worst Halloween candy!#UnwantedHalloweenTreatspic.twitter.com/qniaFiojKu
— 𝓒𝓱𝓪𝓭™ (@hawkeyeinmd) October 31, 2014
Where do people even buy these? I think they just start sending you bags of them when you join the AARP.
7. Zit Poppers
https://twitter.com/fitnessfoolery/status/527932918241312768
This is actually the grossest candy I’ve ever seen in my life. It’s just… too real.
8. Toothbrush
Remember that one house that always gave away toothbrushes? #UnwantedHalloweenTreats
— Heather Wilde (@heathriel) October 31, 2014
This one always feels kind of like a slap in the face. It’s like going to an all-you-can-eat buffet where they hand you a Jenny Craig brochure at the door. Stop ruining our fun, toothbrush guy!
9. Fiber One
Apparently someone in the neighborhood was ill prepared for trick or treat #halloweenfailpic.twitter.com/Rmf57dsBJ4
— Don Taylor (@DonTaylorIII) November 1, 2013
Don’t be the person who hands out your leftover adult snack food on Halloween. The only thing worse than getting one of these would be getting…
10. Raisins
#UnwantedHalloweenTreats Incomplete Raisinets pic.twitter.com/EP8e0E8QPc
— FrancescoMarciuliano (@fmarciuliano) October 30, 2014
There’s one house on every block that commits this gravest of Halloween sins — giving out a box of raisins. Nothing is more soul crushing than seeing a bowl of these little red boxes, and the raisins are always the driest, grittiest you’ve ever had. If you’re the raisin person in your neighborhood, I beg you, from all of us: STOP!
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