You have some really funny traditions
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There’s eating involved, so we’ll call these traditions food related.
Two words: reindeer poop. OK, so it’s a marshmallow snack, but I can imagine the kids get quite a kick out of that. Admittedly, as a 30-something, it sounds pretty awesome to me.
Santa’s junk-food-eating brother sounds pretty great: “We write letters from Plumpergut, Santa’s brother, the black sheep of the family. He eats a ham sandwich, a bowl of pork rinds and a bottle of Bud Light and writes a silly note back.”
You also have some really touching traditions
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“My family reuses the same tablecloth at every Christmas, and every year all of the guests sign the tablecloth, and then it is embroidered. It’s great to see how the signatures have changed over the years.”
Was that a collective “aww” I just heard?
You celebrate with food from all over the world
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Along with all the holiday standards, you make German springerles and tamales, celebrate the Feast of the Seven Fishes and order Chinese food, pizza and more.
“My mom does a German continental breakfast with all the best cheeses and lunchmeats along with croissants and sparkling cider or Champagne.”
“My holiday meals consist of traditional turkey and stuffing but then it’s combined with soul food and Italian dishes.”
“I’m Trinidadian so we sing parang and eat sweet bread.”
“Here’s a Filipino tradition — collecting 13 kinds of round fruits that will be laid out on the dining table, to be eaten by family members on New Year’s Eve.”
You have disaster stories that make us all feel better about our own dinners
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Next time you forget to turn the oven on or you drop a pie, remember you’re in good company.
“Our family dog ate not only the Christmas turkey but all the Christmas cookies my mom had made for dessert. We had grilled cheese sandwiches and sides for dinner.”
Nothing like a good ol’ Christmas grilled cheese.
“The electricity went out during cooking one year for several hours and my mom was making oyster dressing. We all ended up with food poisoning.”
Ouch.
“…the first year that I ever had Baileys in the house. I put it in my coffee, several times Christmas morning, thinking of it solely as a flavored creamer, completely forgetting it was alcoholic. Mommy was half cracked before noon Christmas day…”
Isn’t that what Christmas morning is for?
“One year my cat knocked over the tree at the same time I dropped the roasted duck on the floor!”
Talk about perfectly bad timing.
“I was hosting a Christmas party… and my husband had just finished intensively cleaning the kitchen floor, when a large tray of rice pudding fell off the counter and landed food-side down. We scraped it back up and sprinkled some more cinnamon on top. No one ever knew…”
Next time there’s extra cinnamon on your rice pudding, beware.
“My daughter caught a pie on fire, tried to put it out with a dish towel that also caught fire, then used the spray nozzle on the sink! Wettest holiday meal ever (nothing had gone out to the table yet). We ordered takeout.”
Takeout and wine. Lots of wine.
You also have very bad, food-loving dogs
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A very common theme among the holiday food disasters was dogs. Dogs running off with the turkey, dogs getting into the ham, dogs eating all the candy canes. But this one has to be my favorite:
“One Christmas our hound ate several boxes of chocolates… except for the cream-filled ones. He spit them out. These were wrapped boxes under the tree!”
I have to agree with the dog here… the cream-filled ones are gross.
More holiday eats
Make the most of your holiday roast with these tips for cooking meat
10 Hilarious Christmas baking fails you have to see
23 Amazing make-ahead, no-bake holiday treats
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