Odd foods are really having a moment right now. With food tourism becoming an increasingly popular business, it seems everyone is constantly looking for the latest or at least greatest trendy meal. However, as the holiday season draws closer, a perennial favorite — the candy cane — is garnering a lot of attention thanks to some, um, strange combinations.
Make no mistake: Some newer flavors don’t sound too bad. For instance, last year, Oreo’s new cookies and cream candy can flavor was a hit. And while we haven’t seen any approachable new flavors surface quite yet this year (it is September, after all), Archie McPhee has released three flavors that are questionable at best: pizza, ham and kale.
But fear not, sweet friends. If you don’t want to try them, you don’t have to. We’ve rounded up some of the craziest candy cane combinations out there and ranked them from least to most offensive. So sit back, relax, read, gag and/or enjoy!
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A version of this article was originally published October 2018.
Cinnamon
Here's the thing: Peppermint, the most common candy cane flavor, is also a gum flavor. So is cinnamon. So a cinnamon-flavored candy cane doesn't seem like a stretch, at least not to us. In fact, we may buy (and try) these right now.
Offensiveness rating: 0/10
Cinnamon candy canes, $6.99 at Candy Favorites
Pickle
Pickle-flavored products are all the rage, and we get the appeal. The salty-sweet combination can’t be beat. But the lack of juiciness keeps this cane from receiving a higher rating.
Offensiveness rating: 4/10
Pickle candy canes, $8.99 at Candy Favorites
Bacon
Bacon sounds good, right? I mean, it is America’s favorite breakfast meat. But this porky product should have stayed with eggs. No. Nope. No thanks.
Offensiveness rating: 5/10
Bacon candy canes, $9.97 at Candy Favorites
Mac & cheese
We’ll be first to admit we love macaroni and cheese. Like, love it. It is warm, creamy and comforting. But we’re not so sure about these candy canes. They just seem, um, wrong.
Offensiveness rating: 5/10
Mac & cheese candy canes, $8.45 at Amazon
Pizza
A pizza-flavored candy cane? No, thanks; we prefer it sliced and hot.
Offensiveness rating: 6/10
Pizza candy canes, $6.50 at Archie McPhee
Rotisserie chicken
All right, what fresh and feathered hell is this?! I mean, mac and cheese candy canes were questionable enough, but rotisserie chicken? Thanks, but we’ll pass.
Offensiveness rating: 7/10
Rotisserie chicken candy canes, $7.99 at Candy Favorites
Gravy
They say gravy makes everything better, and while I love to smother my turkey and mash in the warm, brown goodness, I do not want to suck on a stick of slimy meat fat.
Offensiveness rating: 8/10
Gravy candy canes, $9.99 at Amazon
Ham
We don’t know what’s more off-putting: the fact these canes taste like salty ham or the creepy, anthropomorphic ham on the packaging…
Offensiveness rating: 9/10
Hamdy canes, $6.50 at Archie McPhee
Kale
Kale? Garden fresh? What?
Offensiveness rating: 9/10
Kale candy canes, $6.50 at Archie McPhee
Clam
Despite their snappy name, Clamdy Canes are not creative or cute. At all. In fact, whoever invented this god-awful flavor should be banned to the underworld and forced to watch reruns of The Apprentice for all eternity.
Offensiveness rating: 10/10
Clamdy Canes, $6.50 at Archie McPhee
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