Dating can be hard work. You have to look good, project confidence, act interested (but not weirdly obsessive), laugh at all the right moments (and none of the wrong ones) and hope you don’t end up with something stuck in your teeth for the majority of the evening. To remove some of the stress of dating, we’ve put together some simple tips aimed at taking your next date from barely tolerable to totally great.
Smile more
This is the simplest of the actions on our list but by far the most important. When you’re nervous or preoccupied with how the date is going, it can be easy to forget to smile and instead appear tense or bored. We’re not suggesting you grin like a maniac the entire time, but do remember that body language and how you present yourself count if you want to make a positive impression, and appearing friendly and relaxed by smiling is a great way to do that.
Ask questions
Conversation doesn’t always come easily on a first date or when you’re just getting to know someone new. The easiest way to avoid awkward silences and to really get to know who your date is is to ask questions. Ask him things that will help spark conversation and give you something to build a discussion on (try to avoid questions that require only yes or no answers).
| If you’re really worried about the conversation flowing smoothly, think about several questions and conversation topics you can bring to the table before you leave the house. Scan the latest headlines, think about anecdotes you can share and figure out what you most want to know about him so you’re prepared once you sit down to dinner. |
Don’t be shy
We know this one’s easier said than done, but there’s really no reason to be timid when you’re out on a date. The more reserved and quiet you are, the harder it’s going to be for your date to get to know you. If you’re quiet by nature, we don’t expect you to be dancing on a table by the end of the evening (that would just be weird), but do put an effort into opening up about yourself as a way to connect with the person sitting across from you.
| For every question you ask your date, be prepared to provide your own answer once he responds. For example, if you ask him what his favorite memory from childhood is, have your own response to that question ready. This is a great way to ensure the conversation flows well and that you continue to open up despite feeling shy. |
Be yourself
The worst thing you can do on a date is try to act like someone you’re not in order to impress a new guy. If you do, you’ll just end up feeling uncomfortable and out of place all night. In the end, if he doesn’t like you for who you are, he’s probably not worth wasting time on. Life is much too short to pretend you like things you hate or you do things you’ve never done just to make an impression. If you want to have fun and make a connection with someone, be yourself and act as genuine as possible.
Relax
Being stressed out on or before a big date is normal, but you’ll have a much better experience if you do your best to relax. The more anxious you feel, the more your date will pick up on your feelings of nervousness, so rather than putting him on edge with your mood, stay calm and focus on having fun.
| Before you date, spend some time doing anything that relaxes you. Hit the gym, go for a run, lie in a hot bath or phone your BFF – anything to take the edge off your anxiety. |
More dating tips
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