Janet Jackson may take the cake for the most mortifying wardrobe malfunction of all time, but these girls’ embarrassing fashion fails definitely come in as a close second. From broken zippers to split pants, we’re just glad they can laugh at them now!
A pop, lock and drop it pants split
“Back in the day I prided myself on knowing all the latest and greatest pop culture phenomenons. So when ‘Pop, Lock and Drop It’ busted on the scene in high school, I of course had to learn and share it. I’m over at a girlfriend’s house one day after class and we’re talking and messing around. Then, this song comes on the radio and my overly confident, teenage, cargo-jean-wearing self takes the opportunity to show off my newly learned dance grooves. I swagger over to the middle of the room, making quite a scene in front of my six friends, siblings and a few neighbors thrown in. I get into the beat of the music, go in for the pop, down for the lock and that was it. My pants literally exploded! They ripped all the way up the inside of my leg and around the back, up the behind. Everyone was rolling around laughing hysterically. I got up and my pants were literally hanging from my waist. I was thong clad, buttocks exposed. Right in time for my friend’s dad to come in the room to tell us to turn the music down! Sooo embarrassing…” — Chelsea D., 23
Wait… you bought a nursing bra???
“In high school I was on the hunt for a bra that really had some stability. I’m not that heavy chested, but I was sick of buying ones that didn’t do anything for me. Finally, I spotted my perfect bra at Target. It was black, lacy and had all the coverage and support that I needed. I was at a party with some girlfriends, and I just had to tell them about this miracle bra. After gushing about it, I mentioned that it did have these weird snaps in the front. To illustrate my point, I went to show them and unsnapped the hook that I was talking about. Out popped my boob! I was wearing a nursing bra. My girlfriends will never let me live that story down.” — Ann M., 28
The big bathroom zipper disaster
“I have (what I think) is a very cool zip-up jumpsuit. I look like I belong on Charlie’s Angels when I wear it. Anyway, I was at the mall one day in the public bathroom near the food court, very far away from where I’d parked my car. As I went to zip up, the zipper got stuck on a stray thread and when I tugged, it came right off the track. This zipper goes from stem to stern, mind you, so I was totally exposed. I had to walk throughout the mall (it was nighttime so I didn’t want to walk around outside) clutching my zipper shut in two strategic spots and shuffle my way to my car. I’m pretty sure people were staring, though I was staring straight ahead and avoiding eye contact with anyone!” — Jennifer J., 39
Thank goodness for staplers
“The strap of my dress broke during my stepdaughter’s wedding ceremony. I had to hold my hand across my chest like I was hugging myself throughout the entire service. I also had to search the Sunday school classroom for a stapler (yes… a stapler) to fix it.” — Annie P., 47
Dressed to impress in Sharpie
“I knew I looked great in my pale violet sheath dress while giving a presentation to a room full of corporate executives explaining why my weight loss programs were the perfect solution for their employees struggling with extra pounds. I highlighted that my personalized attention to every detail was what made my success rate so high. Usually, HR people jump at the chance to outsource part of their wellness program so I was a little surprised when the meeting ended quickly after my presentation. However, as soon as I got home and took off my dress, I understood. My 4-year-old daughter had taken a black Sharpie and scribbled all over the back of my dress, unfortunately, on the area that covers my buttocks. Where was my attention to detail that morning?” — Claire P.
And it all falls down
“I’ve lost a lot of weight and was wearing an older matching knitwear skirt and top for an all-day strategy session with my nonprofit board of directors. When I stood up to speak, the elastic went out on the skirt, and it fell down around my ankles! Of course it had to be when all of the attention was on me! Thank heavens I was wearing pretty and decent panties that day!” — Kristin F., 52
A hole smack dab in the crotch
“I was in physical therapy for a torn leg ligament and was asked to wear leggings or shorts to make it easier for the therapist to do massages and stretch me out. Every day I attended, I wore leggings (no panties), as the shorts had cotton crotches, along with a long tee. That day I returned home and was changing and realized the pair of shorts I had worn to therapy had a hole the size of a fifty-cent piece smack dab in the crotch! That meant all of the stretching we had done had me fully exposed! The therapist never said anything or did anything different. We laughed as usual. However, I never returned to therapy. I eventually healed but I would rather have my leg fall off and eaten by lions than ever have to face him again!” — Bridgette A., 38
Boobs caught on camera
“I was teaching step aerobics in Jamaica and sporting a tight pair of spandex yoga pants and a killer citrus yellow halter top. I’m a size 34B, so no need for a bra, right? Wrong! I’m in front of the class, stepping like a maniac and after 10 minutes, I notice some of my steppers looking at me real funny! But I continue on, stepping, jumping and pumping. Then I hear, ‘Lucie your breasts have popped out of your blouse.’ I look down, and what do I see? Two perky breasts fully exposed for the world to see. I look back up and the entire class is like, ‘Oh my God!’ Mind you, some dirty old men were taking pics of me like that! I was so mortified!” — Lucie B., 46
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