Time is bipolar; it crawls along at a glacial pace or flies at lightning speed.
I now have two teenage girls and can feel the fast-forward button being pushed in my life. In no time at all, they will be off to college, and I’m afraid I will be wandering around the house complaining that I don’t have anything to complain about. No clothes strewn everywhere, no dirty dishes left everywhere, no highly emotional girls lounging everywhere. Which is sad, as I love lounging with highly emotional girls. Consequently, I hang and lounge as much as I can to drink them up before they are out.
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As we lounged this week, I posed some mother questions. I thought it was a cool way to honor Mother’s Day, since without them I wouldn’t be eligible for this holiday. The answers are interesting, contradictory, loving and honest, just like (I assume) all of our kids.
1. What’s your favorite thing to do — just you and me?
— 14-year-old: Lie in bed, insult each other and make each other laugh.
— 15-year-old: Reading in bed together and touching feet.
2. What’s the best thing about being my daughter?
— 14-year-old: You are always there for advice.
— 15-year-old: You give us space and freedom.
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3. What’s the worst thing about being my daughter?
— 14-year-old: That you go away to work for months.
— 15-year-old: That you turn into an ogre at night.
4. What would you do differently as a parent?
— 14-year-old: I would be stricter about little chores around the house. I guess I would be more of a pain in the ass.
— 15-year-old: I would make sure my kids spend more time on their own. So they learn how to function in the world. You do too much for us.
5. What would you do the same as a parent?
— 14-year-old: I would want to create the same home life: safe, open, no judging (I feel like I can tell you anything.)
— 15-year-old: I would let my kids mess up, the way you let us mess up.
6. If you could change one big thing about your mom, what would it be?
— 14-year-old: That you would learn your breaking point.
— 15-year-old: That you would stop giving me advice.
7. What looks like the best part of being a mother?
— 14-year-old: That you always have a companion in your kid.
— 15-year-old: That you get to love a kid.
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8. What looks like the worst part of being a mother?
— 14-year-old: Have to raise a kid!
— 15-year-old: That you have to bring out the best person that kid can be, that’s tough.
9. What’s the most important decision you will ever make?
— 14-year-old: Whether or not to have a child.
— 15-year-old: Who I am going to marry.
10. What do you think is one of the most important lessons I taught you?
— 14-year-old: To be honest.
— 15-year-old: To hold onto yourself.
11. What do you think most teens wish their moms understood about them?
— 14-year-old: That we are going to hate you for a few years, or we won’t like you, but we will always love you.
— 15-year-old: That we can’t be perfect all the time, and that we are very different people than our parents think we are — not necessarily in a bad way — just really different. Oh, and that we really need to be listened to. Just listening, no opinions!
Do you have any questions to ask your kids? If so, I would love to hear their answers. Finally, HAPPY MOTHER’S DAY! I am so happy to have a membership card to this club.
Love,
Flicka
For more on Felicity and motherhood, check out her talking about her own mom:
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