Chrissy Teigen‘s powerful honesty about her tragic pregnancy loss this week has brought out plenty of cruel trolls — but it has also done a huge service to so many who have suffered miscarriage, simply by breaking the silence about a topic that is so common, and yet seen as somehow taboo. Plus, Teigen’s speaking out in her time of grieving has inspired others to open up about their own experiences with miscarriage and stillbirth — including actor Kate Beckinsale.
Beckinsale posted on her Instagram Friday to criticize the heartless individuals who have been attacking Teigen during this incredibly difficult time for her and her family.
“I’ve noticed people criticizing @chrissyteigen for sharing deeply intimate photos of the loss of her baby,” Beckinsale writes. “As if there’s some protocol during soul-scouring calamity that, if not observed, emboldens people who do not know her or her family to say how she should be handling the unimaginable. Years ago, I lost a baby at 20 weeks.”
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Beckinsale explains that she kept her own pregnancy and loss a secret, because she felt she had to.
“I had managed to keep my pregnancy quiet and I absolutely collapsed inside and no one would have known,” she continues. “There is grief, shame and shock so often that come with an experience like this, plus the heartbreak of your body continuing, after the loss, to act as if it had a child to nurture. Your milk comes in, with no one to feed. It can be the loneliest, most soul-destroying period of time.”
As for those followers who found Teigen’s Instagram post and photos of her loss to be an “overshare”? Beckinsale has just the right message for them: This is not about you. And if you really want to consider your role in someone else’s mourning? Be grateful that they’ve included you.
“It’s an honour to be allowed into another person’s grief,” Beckinsale writes. “Especially with a subject like this which so often puts a woman into that hall of mirrors state of life continuing as if the world hasn’t, for you, come to a bloody and terrible halt. Sending so much love to the Legend family, but also so much to the women and couples who have kept it quiet and suffered. I know there are so many. Thank you @chrissyteigen for making sure it is abundantly clear how devastating this is, and how life changing it can be without support. Let’s let the grieving decide what’s right for them. Send support or keep quiet.”
Wiser words on the internet were perhaps never spoken.
If you or someone you know has experienced a miscarriage, stillbirth, or death of an infant, visit Share Pregnancy and Infant Loss Support to find local support groups and other resources to help cope through this difficult time.
These other famous parents have been open about suffering miscarriages.
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