Have you ever hyped up your kids for a sleepover at their grandparents’ house, only for someone to throw up in their car seat on the way there? Or maybe you planned on going to story time at the library, but the kids seemingly forgot how to brush their teeth and put their shoes on that morning. Life happens! Things don’t always go according to plan, but telling your kids you have to cancel something they’ve been counting on? I’d rather step on a hundred Legos barefoot! One mom is going viral for her summertime hack to help minimize kids’ disappointment, and it’s brilliant.
A mom on X (formerly Twitter) with the username @sarahradz_ posted the simple advice on Wednesday morning: “If you have kids under the age of 6 and fun plans this summer, DO NOT tell them about the fun plans until you are literally arriving at the plans. Pulling up to the gate.”
In a separate tweet, she shared an example: “Last time we took a flight, we told them in the car we were going to look at the airport and come straight home again. Like cut it into small pieces just trust me.”
Oh girl, I have had to learn this lesson the hard way! My kids (6, 5, and 2) do not handle a change of plans well if the plans involve fun. (They’re totally fine if I change my mind about cleaning up toys or something boring, of course.) I’ve had to take my kids to a playground in the dark — several times! — after promising them a trip and then things coming up that delayed it. People make fun of me all the time for my kids not knowing what’s going on this weekend, but honestly? It’s soooo much better to surprise them with the fun plans as they are happening than to risk having to comfort them after those plans no longer come to fruition. Just this morning, my 5-year-old was crying real tears about missing his school’s water and bounce house day — because we will be going to Disneyland instead. That should tell you everything you need to know about keeping quiet about your plans!
The tweet, which already has over 273,000 views and 10,000 likes, really resonated with people. “Pulling up to the gate AND it is open AND you remembered to bring the tickets AND no one has vomited in the car,” one person wrote.
“Literally what my parents did haha,” someone else commented. “One time I was told we were going a car wash station to help a family wash clothes ruined by a sewage explosion but it was actually a Chuck E. Cheese trip.”
Smart — except Sarah warns against this kind of diversion as well. “I want to steal this but I legitimately think my boys would be disappointed not to see a sewage explosion,” Sarah wrote. And honestly, same!
Another reason this is a brilliant hack? If you tell your kids well in advance about something exciting, they will ask every other second about it. “THIS. I told my 5yo daughter we were going to the children’s museum before we move to the new city,” another person wrote. “She asks me EVERY SINGLE DAY if we are going today. And it’s not until July 7th. I keep making this same mistake. I have finally learned.” Oof!
“How many more sleeps is it? Is it tomorrow? Is it the tomorrow after tomorrow? Are we there yet? I don’t want to go? Can we pack? Are we there yet? Is it today? Why is it not tomorrow?” another mom wrote, impersonating her impatient kids.
Still, some people warned that this approach may not work for all children, so you just have to judge for yourself whether it’s the best strategy for your family. “Okay but my parents tried this with a trip to Disney world when my sister and I were 5 and 3 and it absolutely backfired,” someone wrote. “We were kids that need to emotionally prepare ourselves. A very no surprises family. Maybe don’t hype it months in advance, but some kids are not into that.”
“Our daughter is autistic and has anxiety, so this never would have worked for her because she likes to know exactly what is happening, so she can mentally and emotionally prepare,” another mom wrote. “A surprise would have led to a total meltdown. She’s still like this.”
As parents, it’s impossible to protect our kids from all disappointments. The Child Mind Institute says if you are in this situation, it’s best to start by listening to them, avoid judging their reactions, emphasize your support for your child, and try to find solutions. Maybe you can grab ice cream since you missed story time, and you can reschedule the sleepover for next weekend. The way you handle disappointment and changed plans will also go a long way to modeling your kids’ behavior. Because let’s face it: disappointments are a part of life. So, if you can practice coping and processing those feelings as kids, they will be more prepared for later in life.
Until then, waiting for the last second to share your excitement with kids might just save your sanity this summer!
Before you go, check out these exciting outdoor toys for your littles!
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