From the moment we heard the story about 11-year-old Meghan Markle’s campaign to get Proctor & Gamble to stop running ads that depicted dishwashing as women’s work, we wanted our kids to look up to her. Little did we know that we would also wind up looking up to this actor-turned-duchess ourselves. But here we are on the occasion of Markle’s 39th birthday, thinking, yep we should be mothers more like her.
Markle’s first year as a mother to baby Archie has been full of ups and a lot of downs. Sure, she had more luxuries than we could imagine — all those nannies! trips around the globe! But they came at the price of relentless tabloids targeting her for anything from using the wrong stroller to, well, being a Black American. Rumors of tension with Prince Harry’s family were only rivaled by the awfulness of her own — lovely mom Doria Ragland excepted. That’s a lot to deal with on top of all the hard new mom stuff like figuring out breastfeeding and sleep-training and wondering whether you are the same person you used to be now that you have this tiny human being depending on you.
When we were looking back to find Meghan Markle’s “best” mom moments for this, we couldn’t put together a collection of doting quotes and gauzy Instagram shots, the way we would for any other celebrity mom. Instead, we relived her roller-coaster year and came out of it admiring her as much for the tough decisions she had to make — in particular, leaving that royal life behind — as for the moments we saw her making dreamy eyes at Archie. She is a fierce mama bear protecting her child from the world, no matter the cost.
We keep going back to that moment during her Africa tour when ITV’s Tom Bradby asked Markle a seemingly simple question: How is she doing? She spoke of the pressures of motherhood in the spotlight, but came the closest to tears when she concluded by saying, “Thank you for asking, because not many people have asked if I’m OK.”
That right there is a strong mother — one who can show us that it is OK to admit when things suck, because only then can she start to make it better, for the sake of her son and herself.
A Productive Pregnancy
Markle poured herself into her charitable efforts during her pregnancy. She was especially devoted to Smart Works, an organization that helps unemployed women dress for job interviews.
A Private Childbirth
Unlike Kate Middleton, who has posed in front of the hospital after having her children, Markle and Prince Harry kept away from the press for days after she gave birth. Many saw it as a sign of what was to come.
Presenting Archie Harrison Mountbatten-Windsor
Markle’s bold moves as a mother began with her son’s unconventional name, Archie. She and Harry also decided not to give their son a title. That’s about as much normal as they could give him at the time.
“It’s pretty amazing. I have the two best guys in the world so I’m really happy,” she told the press, giving us our first glimpse of Archie, who “has the sweetest temperament, he’s really calm. He’s been the dream. It’s been a special couple [of] days.”
Maternity Leave & Her Postpartum Body
Aside from a couple of brief appearances, Markle took an actual maternity leave away from the public eye. According to a report from Glamour, she was also not in any rush to do rigorous dieting and exercise after having Archie. “It’s been a natural embracing of motherhood, and with that has come a pretty gentle routine…. Meghan hasn’t been hitting the gym,” the source told the magazine. “She hasn’t been in any hurry to get back in shape. It’s only four weeks, really, since the birth, and she’s been taking that exercise regime very gently, indeed.”
Family Support
Markle’s mother, Doria Ragland, flew to the U.K. to help here daughter in Archie’s earliest months. Somehow, we don’t think the Queen stopped by to help with night feedings.
Three Nannies & a Baby
We can’t possibly blame Meghan and Harry for getting professional help with Archie — including a night nurse for when he was first born. They also supposedly tried some nannies that didn’t work out, which, considering the difficulty they have maintaining their privacy, was also understandable. We’re stressed out just thinking about it!
Still Figuring It Out, Like All Moms Do
After her first public outing with Archie, to a charity polo match, onlookers criticized Markle for how she was holding him in these photos. We see a protective mother shielding her kid from prying eyes. This came up again months later, when paparazzi snapped her with a squirming Archie in a baby carrier in Canada. Thank goodness paps weren’t around when we were figuring out those things!
Return From Maternity Leave
Markle’s return to the workplace came in the form of a tour of Africa. But while she had 4-month-old Archie with her, she made sure not to mess with his all-important schedule. “We’re doing well,” she told reporters. “I think the schedule — they have been very kind to me, because everything is based around Archie’s feeding times. So it’s a full plate.”
When ‘Bubba’ Drools on a Nobel Laureate
Archie got a lot of love from Archbishop Desmond Tutu and his daughter, and he apparently returned the love with smiles and a bit of drool. That’s when we got to hear his mom’s very down-to-earth nickname for him: Bubba.
Putting on a Happy Face, When She’d Rather Cry
“Any woman, especially when they’re pregnant, you’re really vulnerable, and so that was made really challenging,” Markle told ITV of how new motherhood has been under such close scrutiny. “And then when you have a newborn, you know. And especially as a woman, it’s a lot. So you add this on top of just trying to be a new mom and trying to be a newlywed.”
You Can’t Help But Spoil Him
Meghan and Harry’s first steps away from the royal family and toward becoming a family of three began over the winter holidays, in Canada. “Archie is Meghan and Harry’s world, and they can’t help [but spoil him],” an insider said of their holidays. “For Christmas, they bought him books, building blocks, a baby ball pit. It’s not all about extravagant gifts for them.”
Getting Space From the In-Laws
In their initial “Megxit” declaration, Harry and Meghan said they were going to Canada part-time. “This geographic balance will enable us to raise our son with an appreciation for the royal tradition into which he was born, while also providing our family with the space to focus on the next chapter, including the launch of our new charitable entity.” Oh, yes, we also have needed that space from our families.
A Smash Cake & the Gift of Privacy
Between Megxit and COVID-19, the public hasn’t seen much of Archie since winter. We did see Meghan read to Archie in a video for Save the Children on his first birthday in May. But we got no pics of the strawberries and cream smash cake she reportedly baked for him.
A Great Role Model for Archie
“Don’t be afraid to do what you know is right, even when it’s not popular, even when it’s never been done before, even if it scares people, and even if it scares you a little,” Markle told the Girl Up 2020 Leadership Summit this July. “Your gut will tell you what’s right and what’s wrong, what’s fair and what’s unfair. The hardest part, and the hardest part for me, was to chase the conviction with action.”
Enjoying All the Milestones
We’re hearing third-hand from anonymous sources that Archie is talking and has taken his first steps. As much as we long to see all these moments, we understand Meghan and Harry’s reason for keeping to themselves, after all they’ve been through. If that means we have to keep re-living this one time they all met Archbishop Tutu, that’s our problem, not theirs.
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