We see a lot of baby name drama on Reddit, but not a whole lot of teen name drama. One of our first tastes came last month when two teens decided they wanted to legally change their names from Katherine and George to Ember and Ryder. Their mom was extremely upset, trying to guilt them into not making things official. And Redditors … well … they had Big Feelings about those names in particular.
“In 10 years they are likely going to regret their self-inflicted YA Romance protagonist names,” one person said. And that was just the start of the jokes.
Now we’re getting more teen name drama, this time from a 15-year-old boy who joined the “Am I The A—hole? (AITA?)” subreddit to talk about his family. He has a 13-year-old little brother and a 16-year-old big sister, and when his parents were picking out their names, they decided they wanted a common thread.
“They wanted our names to have a theme without being matchy with the same initial,” the teen who originally posted (the “OP”) said. “The story was told to us when we were little and my parents were proud of the names they gave us.”
That is until recently, when OP’s parents started to look at things in a different light. Things have been spiraling, and now the OP wants to know, “AITA for refusing to let my parents rename me?”
The Names
So what did OP’s parents go with? Water-themed names. His name is Cove, his brother’s name is River, and his sister’s name is Ocean.
They’re beautiful names, and we have entire lists of mermaidcore baby names, surfer girl names, and beachy names for any expectant parents who are on the same — ahem — wavelength.
The Weird Twist
Based on Ember and Ryder’s experience, we figured these teens would be the ones wanting to change their names. But no. Their parents — the people who picked the names! — were the ones having second thoughts.
“My parents started to express regret about their choices for us,” OP said. “They actually told us over dinner one night that they wish they had given us better names and apologized for making us live with the names we were given.”
A few months later, these parents announced that they wanted to change OP’s name from Cove to James, his sister’s name from Ocean to Elizabeth, and his brother’s name from River to Michael.
“They told him Michael was a timeless name that would age well and gave him some nickname choices. He said he hated it. So they asked if he would consider Charles instead which he said was an even bigger no.”
Why Now?
This is such an unexpected scenario. Not only did these parents have nine months to choose a name, but then they had more than a decade to live with those names, and now they have regrets? Now they want to change them? OP’s parents said that since no one had their driver’s license yet, and since no one was in college, now would be the time to do it.
The Current Situation
All siblings are still standing strong.
“I told my parents that I know they regret the names but we’re all used to and like our names and don’t want to go for more boring and common names,” OP said. “My parents argued that in the future we will regret it and we’d have to pay for it ourselves when we’re adults and we realize having weird names does not age well.”
OP made a good point, saying they can’t just change their names in the future if they end up feeling that way.
So what was the parents’ next tactic? They told OP to look online and see what people thought of their names. (Ummm, did the parents post on AITA? Asking for a friend!)
Cove looked and saw “a lot of hate” for his and his siblings’ names. Which begs the question … why would the parents want him to see that? What a cruel thing to do to his confidence.
“I told them it still didn’t change my mind,” he wrote. “My parents said we should respect them enough as parents to allow this and that we’re all being disrespectful. AITA?”
Reddit’s Reaction
Reddit is absolutely floored — and totally Team Teens.
“NTA, I think Cove is a bad*ss name,” said the top comment, with 11 thousand upvotes. “Also it’s wild to me that they just suggested names they wanted you to change to and didn’t ask you if you had a name you’d rather be called.”
“You should definitely keep the name Cove … the most important thing is that you guys like your names … Your name and your choice to keep it or change it.”
“Love the fact that y’all wear your names like a Badge of Honor …! Moreover, parents planting uncertainty in the mind of growing kids is distasteful …!”
Then, in true Reddit fashion, Redditors started speculating about ulterior motives and possible cult involvement.
“Too bad that River Phoenix’s first name kept him from being nominated for an Oscar. Oh wait, it didn’t. It’s pretty suspicious that the parents are so adamant about changing these names against the kids’ will, and deadset on picking the new names for people who are more than old enough to have formed their own identities and preferences. I don’t think they are being candid with OP and siblings about their motives … Is there a rich uncle whose will says these parents only get his Scrooge McDuck millions if they change the kids’ names to honor him or something? I don’t know what the motive is, but their actions are not consistent with merely regret over something the kids are unbothered by.”
“I’m wondering what church your parents are trying to join where they are too embarrassed to state your names.”
“It sounds like joining a church or some kind of cult, yes. WTF??”
“Maybe it’s the opposite, they were in cult mode for whatever reason when they decided the original names and now want to course correct. Like a hippie naming their child Rainbow Peace then looking back and thinking ‘WTF was I on … oh right, that was good stuff.'”
“There are definitely some cult vibes here, I too am wondering what the parents are into.”
And so what did commenters ultimately do? What Redditors do best, of course: suggesting petty solutions.
“Pick out new names for them and immediately start calling Dad ‘Bob.’ Anytime he complains, just explain to him that he doesn’t understand all of the cool nicknames he will have access to now that he is a Bob. Tell him he will get used to it And if Bob really hates it, in a few years you can give him a new one if your mind changes.”
A classic tactic that will hopefully let the teens enjoy their names in peace. Stay strong, sibs!
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