Uh-oh millennials, Cesar Millan thinks you’re too spoiled to own a dog

If you’re a millennial and you’re thinking about adopting a dog, think again. At least so says controversial dog behaviorist Cesar Millan, who seems to think that millennials are too obsessed with their phones to be good dog owners. Uh, OK.

“The new generation brought the dog inside. But that’s because the new generation don’t have children. You need to fill that empty space,” Millan told the Daily Mail. “You need to love somebody and you need to touch somebody.” Well, first off, millennials are responsible for 80 percent of the 4 million annual births in this country according to one study, so this seems wrong.

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Next, he said that millennials are inherently bad pet owners. “Millennials shouldn’t adopt dogs yet,” he said. “They are always on their phone and have no idea how to relate on a personal matter.” Seeing as the millennial generation is between the ages of 20 and 36 at this point, this is a comment that has little basis in reality.

“They’re not ready to have a one-on-one relationship,” he continued. “A lot of millennials feel independent and can do their own thing, but they have no idea how to relate with other human beings.” Again — what??

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If you’re thinking of getting a dog and you happen to be between the ages of 20 and 36, well, go for it. But if for some reason you want to know what Millan has to say on the subject, he has five questions for you first.

1. Do I get nervous, anxious or frustrated?
2. Do I do exercise every day before I have a dog?
3. Am I a disciplined person?
4. What dog is compatible?
5. What stage of a dog am I ready for? “First timers should foster at a senior stage, they’re slower and easier to manage,” Millan said.

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His final golden nugget, which actually makes way more sense than everything else he told the Daily Mail: Think about fostering before committing to a dog. This makes sense — if you’ve never been a dog owner and you don’t know what it’s like, it’s a good idea to try it out before taking it on full-time. But then he ruined everything with this comment: “They’ve been given everything, how are they going to maintain a dog?”

Wow. Just… wow.