Oh, we’re dead serious here. Your sweetheart, imaginary or real, will never be far away. Datingish.com wants to keep you safe, and creeped out.
http://www.datingish.com
Sexy Bean Bag
Okay, before you make any jokes about your boyfriend’s manhood, consider spicing things up on this sexy bean bag. Got that Sumo Sac?! Thanks Sumo Intimacy!
http://www.sumointimacy.comHarness Zorbing for Two
Why the hell is this not a national craze? Weird, but static-fun for all.
http://www.buyagift.co.ukCouples Letter Book
This actually isn’t too creepy. This opens up communication, which may be weird to the modern couple. http://www.uncommongoods.com
8-bit Dynamic Light Shirt
Your hunny will be the light of your life, literally. http://www.thinkgeek.com
Fundies
All day fun for couples who don’t go to the bathroom. http://www.shopinprivate.com
Dualbrella
Stay uber dry under this double dose of protection. Literally, you’re not going to get wet. This umbrella, essentially, has no game. Hammacher Schlemmer (we’re not kidding on that company name) has provided “the best, the only, and the unexpected” for over 164 years. No kidding. http://www.hammacher.com
DNA Necklace
You know you’re in love when you match DNA. For some reason that just sounds like something Tina Fey would joke about. http://www.incrediblethings.com
Booty Pillows
Pretty self-explanatory. Pillows that look like your choice of booty. We like the Caramel booty and the Amsterdaaam booty. Incrediblethings.com keeps incredible gits at your fingertips.
http://www.incrediblethings.comFace-to-Face Tandem Bikes
The people at Gizmodo Design want to make sure you literally get nowhere on your first date- in every way possible.
http://gizmodo.com/378006/face-to-face-tandem-bike-makes-first-dates-last-datesCouples Snuggie
Doing things for couples a regular blanket can’t. http://www.snuggieblanketfortwo.com/
Blandito – Transformable Furniture Pad
With the Blandito pad you can have lazy Sundays, Mondays, Tuesdays, etc. We’re surprised there’s no cupholder and built-in potato chips dispenser. If you’re really in the market for one, unfinishedman.com has what you need.
Pillow Talk
This isn’t your grandma’s pillow talk. This is literally the creepiest version of that. Knowing when your lover’s head hits the pillow no matter where they’re at in the whole wide world screams Ali Larter in “Obsessed”. Thanks Pillow Talk!
Mojowijo
Crazy name, even crazier purpose. Mojowijo.com has turned a simple remote into a next generation body stimulation device. Essentially, it’s a vibrator that video game nerds can really connect with.
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